I decided to start this separate thread for posting the occasional typos in the story to make it easier to see what's been reported already. Please use spoilers here, especially if you post stuff happening after the demo.
Story typos:
Spoiler:
Using Gems (when the girls get the first gem from their dad)
In this game, armors have all same properties, so you can dress up the sisters how you like. You can use the gems you'll find in the game to make them more powerful though. We're now going to see how it works.
Suggestion to edit:
In this game, you can choose the girls' outfits by looks only as all armors have the same stats. You can improve these basic stats with gems. We're now going to see how this works.
Quick Help (On the inventory screen, when clicking on weapon)
You can click on any armor to add gems to its socket, but you can't do this with weapons or while in a shop. Try it again while you're on the inventory screen.
Since 'gems' is in plural: 'gems to its sockets'
Using Gems
Add precious gems to this item's sockets to assign stats to it. Click on a gem, then on a socket to add the gem, or vice versa. To empty a socket, use the buttons at the bottom. Click confirm once you're happy with the result.
Editing suggestion:
Assign stats to this item by placing gems into its sockets. Click on a gem and then on a socket to add it, or vice versa. Use the buttons at the bottom of the screen to remove gems. Click confirm once you're done.
Robbery Mission info/intro (noble houses)
...Those nobles have less gold coin than merchants, but more money that they convert into precious gems. You can resell or use the gems to improve your equipment....
If you want to cut down the repetition, as the bit about selling gems or using them in sockets was already explained earlier, you could just cut these two sentences down to this short snippet:
'The nobles tend to convert their wealth into precious gems.'
Robbery Mission info/intro (guards' houses)
...They made money fighting for the Capello family and are the most dangerous type.
Edit suggestion:
...They made their fortune fighting for the Capello family and their houses are the most dangerous targets to rob.
Robbery Mission info/intro (guards' houses)
Robbing those people will be more dangerous than it's worth in term of money, but you will gain more experience than anywhere else.
'in terms of money'
Upon visiting a location with no scenes.. you get:
Joanne found nothing interest going on at the market today, so decided to go elsewhere.
Should be either 'nothing interesting' or 'nothing of interest'
plus there's a 'she' missing later: 'so she decided'
It's been a crazy week(&end) so this is how far my notes go so far. Skills next