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Troyen
New Empire Cards Unlocked! (Scene 03)

- Right-click to examine them.



Mission 04

(recon unit explanation)

- all invisible units and increase our power!



Scene 04


- Wait, who is your first mother? (question mark)



-As interesting as that line of thought may be (two words)



-rubble in my hands (not heads)

Franka
I was saving all of Jack's typos on cards for later, once we had all cards released, because I know there are a lot. :lol:
Troyen
Yeah, but I probably won't remember them all then. :p



Marksman Team

- Every turn the marksman team's attack increases by 1, until it has 4 attack.



Scene 05


Mizuki's line:

- there is great slow down (I'm not quite sure what she's trying to say here, so I don't have any suggestions, but it reads weird.)



- the empire was facing an attack near Alpha Centauri.



- the first time my command was on its own.



Scene 06


- no idea just what the hell is going on here.



- from the stars.



- You're talking desertion, you know that? (question mark)

Troyen
Mission 07


game/plot/missions.rpy 764

- Doesn't that beat all? (it's a rhetorical question, but it's still a question)

- I wonder what advice she'd give now. (delete the erroneous "she" before "advice")



789

Orbis, and they drop from the sky is much more deadly. (this makes no sense)

- we need to destroy them.



811

- would need to be giant-monster certified? (question mark)



815

I'm not sure a semi-colon is appropriate here. Seems like a place for an em-dash?



First Galina Talk (I thought this was supposed to be DLC-only?)


game/plot/friendship.rpy 2886

- the teacher was trying to figure out



First Christophe Talk


game/plot/friendship.rpy 1454

- I shouldn't have you jailed? (rhetorical questions are still questions!)



First Mario Talk


friendship2.rpy 1483

- breakout of zits. (one word)



First Samuel Talk


friendship2.rpy 4357

"and time to return him home." (is missing a subject - "then it's time"?)



First Graciela Talk


friendship.rpy 3571

- ride it for pleasure?



3600

- my treat?



First Mizuki Talk


friendship2.rpy 2924

- to death?



2927

- he was truly a psychic detective (line before says "a psychic" and the second part uses "he" anyway which doesn't match with "they")



2930

Nit: I think in-game needs a hyphen?



2938

Graciela's line here is odd. Diane just said she likes board games, Graciela inserts a remark about lag, and everyone else goes back to talking about analog gaming.



Someone's First Talk (I forgot who - Rigel maybe?)


Ballroom dancing

friendship2.rpy 3534

- creep in too much.



3592

- Captain



Mira's First Talk


friendship2.rpy 2162

- tonight?



2176

Tenses don't match. Probably want "I see"



2270

-show you where



Xavier


friendship2.rpy 4978

-I introduce (or "May I", but not "My")

Troyen
Scene before Mission 8 (don't have line number, sorry):

- Power, and <talking about restoring facilities> - delete the comma.



Mission 9


missions.rpy

966 Mizuki says "even I don't have the clearance for it"

970 Diane says "I might be mistaken, but isn't this above your clearance?"

973 The line from Mizuki should read "...that's what I just said!" ;)



During the battle:

"Use Mizuki's Hacker unit and Unoptimal Balance cards" (s, also the casing is inconsistent - Unit should be capitalized or balance lowercase, no?)



Scene 09


talk.rpy 2372

I'm not sure "the" is needed before "blurring censorship"



2485

- would they believe us?



2489

"There won't be a lot of other choice." (were you going for "They won't have a choice."?)



2517

"then" is unnecessary here



Mission 10

1171

- but I can't do that.



Scene 10


talk.rpy 2620

I don't think the "at this time" is needed, makes it sound a little awkward.



2799

- a brave thing!

Miakoda
Almost everything is caught up here except for the Cards, and first part of the instructions.
jack1974
For cards, I'll hold off until they're all "final". Since if I change a card ability, the description will change too. Though of course at this point, except for a few cards, I don't plan any big changes :)
Alex81
In the second dialogue with Lucius, Mira says the following sentence :



"Fear, and guilt. Even after I built you, there were many who were offended you by your shape ; they said it made a mockery of the human form"



(That's a YOU too much no?) That's the only real typo in the sentence (I might've worded that entire sentence differently as well, but I'm really only looking for typos)
Alex81
In what I think is, Alex's third (or maybe 4th) party dialogue, he explains to Graciela how he (and Diana) came to be from two different countries,after Alex and Diana's parents split up. The sentence goes :



" In retrospect, I could see they tried to make it go during the last year, but it just didn't feel right"



That sentence looks very ....strange / wrong to me at least. If I read it correctly Alex is saying their parents tried to make their relationship work,

perhaps the sentence should be more like :



Suggestion :



"In retrospect, I could see they tried to make it work / I saw/knew they tried to make their relationship work."



The original sentence, might read they -tried- to make their relationship/marriage fail, instead of trying to make it work.

Trade the word GO with WORK ( or maybe think up a new way to word the sentence?)
Alex81
Near ending sequence I got this line




MIra gives a glance in the direction of Lucius who is now engaged in a rather one-sided conversation with a couple of awestruck childen



Might want a comma , after Lucius, and add an R to the word children

Miakoda
Thanks Alex81. I will get these typos fixed soon. Holidays, and other works was keeping me busy.
Franka
I currently have about 200 screenshots of typos to go through when I have the time, I'm guessing some were reported already. I have to import some screenshots from the old comp first, but I'll get around to it.
Miakoda
Okay, all typos are currently fixed on my end.


I currently have about 200 screenshots of typos to go through when I have the time, I'm guessing some were reported already. I have to import some screenshots from the old comp first, but I'll get around to it.


Take your time. I appreciate it, but you should also enjoy the holiday season.
Franka
I currently have about 200 screenshots of typos to go through when I have the time, I'm guessing some were reported already. I have to import some screenshots from the old comp first, but I'll get around to it.


Take your time. I appreciate it, but you should also enjoy the holiday season.


I'm actually working this weekend, but I recovered my screenshots, and I expect to get to it tomorrow, after work.
Franka
Sorry if any of these have already been reported, I don't want to cause extra work.



First batch:




Well, it still better odds than buying a lottery ticket.

- it's still



They are beautiful; and giving them as a gift shows you feel the same way to that person.

- same way about that person.



Of course everyone knew what it meant, but this would allow them a chance to flirt, or whatever, without being so crass as comment upon it.

- so crass as to comment



And when like our love, shall take root and blossom?

- I'm actually not sure what you're saying here.



I know it was possible to impress someone's emotions, and surface thoughts, but there was always a limiting factor that it had to sufficiently strong to work

- had to be sufficiently strong



With someone's memory, you could download put it into something else.

- download and put it



I was ordered to the firing range to test the ballistic resistance of what appears to be the science departments new required dress uniform:

- science department's



Named after an obscure 20th century author about robotics.

- author writing about robotics. (?)



I...I'm sorry to report, but that was one of the first pieces data deleted during the attack.

- pieces of data



Or else your trying to seduce them to our side by showing off your abs.

- you're trying



The Maradans nod at the command, and then one points toward you, asking, "But what of her?

- Missing a " at the end. "But what of her?"



However, it appears a full-fledged city appeared in our boundaries.

- within our boundaries.



A skeleton of its former self, it stones taken for other projects, sometimes abandoned to the cats.

- its stones



Yes. The Palidrayans' have first claim to the city.

- Palidrayans have



Yes, but I never heard anyone using Mountains of Madness to help their child sleep.

- Nitpicking, it's probably ok as shorthand speak, but isn't that At the Mountains of Madness?



You turn off the movie with a deep click, finding Charlotte had nestled into your side, and was comfortable with it. Meanwhile, Alicia is excitedly yada yada

- There's a bit of confusing tense here. finding Charlotte has nestled into your side, and is comfortable with it.

or just: finding Charlotte nestled into your side, comfortable with it.



Silence fills the room as you and Alicia look at each other and little to say.

- with little to say.



I was dreading this, but since Alicia brought it up...do you think could keep dating someone with a child?

- do you think you could keep



Or did have some other fun? Of the sexy kind.

- Or did you have some other fun?



Except your resistance prevents me from sharing your sleeping together...at least in your dreams.

- I'm not sure what you're saying here.



Be still my fluttering heart. That was really sweet, although quite not needed.

- not quite needed.

- quite unneeded. (?)



Diana: Well, to borrow from your words, if a star fell from the heavens each time I thought of you, the sky would go dark.

Graciela: ...and would that be the only thing you'd do in the dark?

- That doesn't make any sense. Maybe ...and what would you do to me in the dark?



Graciela stands on her toes, and gives a deep kiss on the lips, further deepening your blush.

- give you a deep kiss



Proceed, but bear in mind I'm likely say no.

- likely to say no.



As Samuel will attest, before the creatures broke-out,

- broke out,



Oh, well in that case wouldn't work. But it has not much interest since Matricks are already easily mind-controlled by the Dredans psionicists...

- it wouldn't work.

- But it's of little interest

- Dredan psionicists...



hat if you grafted it with a terrestrial specis?

- What if



I had a grad student which spliced it with tomatoes.

- who spliced it



Rewor! You should put your claws back in.

- Rowr! (?)

- You should pull your claws back in.



Alex Nelson: Well done, Alex. Shame there isn't enough for a trophy.

- That should probably be Mira speaking. Or else Alex is a self congratulatory jerk.



Indeed. The Dredans have put economic sanctions on the Palidrayans', and the Maradans followed suit.

- Palidrayans,



There would be little we could do stop saturation bombing from orbit,

- do to stop



They've been making contacts with all of the other alien races.

- contact



After they were captured, I was able to do digging in their records.

- do some digging



It's nothing that need to concern you Captain.

- need concern



Well, we already have plants like certain orchids which don't need soil to grow; it wasn't impossible to engineer them to combine oxygen and hyrdrogen from the air to make water.

- hydrogen



I hope you can satisfy my curiosity about why there is a Maradan in colony and why Alicia is here.

- in the colony



Is a mythologist among her people.

- She is a



Then, she crept in, and capture the kits, bringing her back to the people.

- captured the kits

- bringing them back



She searched how and low, but couldn't find them.

- high and low



No, I'd more than willing to let, and let live.

- I'd be more

- to live, and let live.



They certainly weren't going to let their liaisons get stopped by some military protocal.

- protocol.



If anything, she is more than likely give out pointers.

- to give



Actually, that sounds like it could be like fun.

- sound like it could be fun.



Love, I appreciate the effort your making to bond with her, but don't let her walk all over you.

- effort you're making



Reluctantly she lets you go as you remember while you are here.

- remember why you are here.



Graciela's eyes travel along the length of your leg, and you could see her lips part slightly, and she licks her lips.

- you can see

- , as she licks them.



Sometimes it's hard to tell, not unless you invade their mind.

- tell, unless you



I haven't felt Lola for a few day or two now.

- for a day or two



Or hit them from surprise. We could weaken all three aliens in one fell swoop.

- by surprise.

- alien races



I don't see how you can be so chummy with the humans. They're naked skin...it's repulsive.

- Their naked skin...



You scurry on the surface, wrecking it in your passage, scarring the beauteous' Mother's face with your trespasses.

- beauteous Mother's



However, I can't but notice how we all are at death's door w hen we least expect it.

- can't help but

- when we



Mizuki beams under your praise, and some of her tension leaves her body.

- at your praise,

- the tension



From the smoldering gazes, to the amount of...heat...your liable to catch fire.

- you're liable



You don't sound to enthused about that. Do you have a problem with robots?

- too enthused



I mean, it's hard to hug a pet dog if you have look out for sharp corners.

- have to look out



After all, as Catallus once said, 'Being silent does nothing for you...spread thighs blab it not so.

- Didn't Catallus say 'spread thighs blab it's not so.

- In any case theres an apostrophe missing at the end of the quotation.



And funnilt enough, this little tête-à-tête are going to give the robophobes more ammunition.

- is going to



Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't wasn't the hibernaculum destroyed?

- You're wrong. ;) but wasn't the



I know I wanted to send second team out to make sure we didn't leave anything behind.

- send a second team



Two, and more importantly, the Palidrayans' attacked.

- Palidrayans attacked.



You are officers in the Emperess's Army. You have fifteen minutes to compose yourselves, and when you return, it better be as officers fit to wear his uniform.

- Empress'

- wear the uniform.



*laughs* I don't have to read her mind to picture her imagining you...laying out on the bed, bedecked only in your necklace.

- lying on the bed,



Indeed, Diana seems a bit out of sorts, though whether it was from your groups' previous drinking, or something else is hard to tell.

- group's



You almost sound like you'd rather be a poet and archeologist. I could get you a fedora and if you want.

- a fedora and... what?



There the two of you are. Heh, for a while there were rumors had it you both figured out how to live within the network.

- there were rumors you both

or - for a while rumors had it you both



If I was to hazard a guess, I would say some of them are jealous.

- If I were to



You're being serious aren't you? How long was I here, and no ever approached me?

- no one ever



Oh, a new game cooperative game Mizuki recommended, It was quite fun.

- a new cooperative game



I still say the computer cheated. I'm going to do some digging, but there is no way he could have survived the fall at Reichanbach Falls.

- Reichenbach



I looked like it needed a little salt.

- It looked



Oh? Something happen while I was out on maneuvers.

- maneuvers?



Only several people heard something clunking around in the vents.

- Only that

or simply - Several people heard



Well, Alicia did something, but not heart-attack inducing. No, she got much more entrepreneurial. I don't know whether to consider it troubling, or entrepreneurial.

- Ok, so you're in love with that word, but one of those entrepreneurials should probably be something else. :)

Franka
Second batch:




Unless I'm mistaken, it looks there are fetal humans inside.

- It might not exactly be wrong (not sure), but I'd prefer human fetuses



Then we need to figure out why do the Apex Rahns want these?

- why the



There is no honor to enslave children.

- There is no honor in enslaving children.



It was an honor I could do without. Chief slave doesn't look good one one's resume.

- on one's



Even the slaves have their own castes. When the Alpha talked about making the Captain his own warleaders...he was honoring them in his fashion.

- Captains



There may be some individuals who rile against this decision, but know I honor your sacrifice, and service my soldiers, and it is with...

- I'm not sure "service my soldiers" is the right term to use...



Just be ready to live like a nomad if you do so. I don't recommend packing heavy if you do so.

- Too many "do so"s.



Very well, have it your way. In honor of our species newly found peace, I give you a gift of steel silk,

- species'



It's a thoughtful gift Queen Shiler, but you not necessary.

- but not



Don't delude yourself. As weak as your species appears, you feel lure of battle;

- the lure



Just to be sure, you're people won't take this as an act of war?

- your people



Nator, your outburst does you little credit. If only acid drips from your tongue, best to keep it closed.

- best to keep your mouth closed.



The Matrick go for simple domination. Fortunately, it is only most affective on their own people.

- effective



Just once I'd love to see a monster chokes to death on one victim.

- choke to death

- on a victim. or - on its victim.



Captain, do you think some of our own people trying to sabotage us?

- are trying



Understanding? No. You're Palidrayan-Bane. Ancestors' grant strength.

- Ancestors grant



Only a few. Mira assured me she can regenerate their teeth once they learned their lesson.

- they've learned



Not to mention the bootprints were sunk to deep to have come from a Maradan.

- too deep



I'm pleased to see the diplomats' were kept safe and sound during the attack.

- diplomats were



I bet the blood makes for a tough on the clean-up.

- a tough what? time?



Assuming it isn't completely wiped, have you discovered anything else in the Descorian's memory Lucius, Mizuki?

- I'd suggest - memory? Lucius? Mizuki?



A big discouraging; what fun is there with a clear-cut enemy?

- A bit



The more they are, the easier they're to smash.

- the easier they are



Descorian Prime disassembled. If Descorian Secundus engages enemy, then disassemble predicted.

- disassembly predicted.



Given general advertising trends, the Captains would have to be down dressed down in what is colloquially known as their 'skivvies'.

- would have to be dressed down



I took some samples from the children. What was an illness was actually a designer virus.

- What seemed an illness



Be of good cheer; I'm willing to let bygones be bygones. In fact, I offer you a peace offering.

Maybe - I present you with a peace offering. or I bring an offer of peace.



But how certain are this is the real Mira?

- certain are we



Good, they are the least of our concerns. Is there any change with about the satellites?

- change with the



I hate point out, but many of those innocents don't like humans either.

- point it out



And they cured Graciela and Samuel from the Palidrayan's crystal plague.

- the Palidrayan crystal plague.



If we let the Dredans know we are coming to help, then you know he isn't going to run off...if anything, Nator will use that as an opportunity one-up us.

- opportunity to one-up



I've already thought of that. I retained some samples from the Palidrayan's plague...

- Palidrayan plague...



I understand your stance, Charlotte, but it does no harm to hear all the options. What do you intend to use the crystalline dust?

- How do you intend



Take a closer look around you. See here? This is glass. If I was to guess, one of the Dredan's missed, and melted the sand with their energy crossbow.

- If I were to guess

- one of the Dredans missed,



If it was anyone else, I would agree with you. However, I believe it's because someone was hoping to get the drop on us...

- If it were anyone else,



And you don't think the Descorians wouldn't track you down?

- would track you down?



It is an interesting study in the human condition; right now, there appears to be a virtual war going on betwee two camps.

- study on the human condition;



It helps to be trained from childhood in it.

- It helps to be trained in it from childhood.



And they have a real hate for robots. As much as it pains me to say, but you might want court them as allies, Captain.

- to say, you might

- want to court them



With what? The Apex Rahn don't exactly let any but the most trusted of their slaves weapons practice because it might give them ideas,

- practice weapons



Correct. However, you were seeking a way to control the Apex Rahn, and this is would work, at least in the short term.

- and this would work,



Good point Charlotte. I should engineer it to so that getting the antidote gives one a euphoric high.

- engineer it so



That's the beauty of it; it will be in aerosol form. Whether it is vreathed in, or absorbed throught he skin, both are equally effective.

followed by

That's the beauty of it, there aren't any.

- Strike the second snetence, I guess.



Even if you get close, I doubt the Apex Rahn are going to let the Captain go after he's posioned them.

I've already thought of that. The Captain will have ten minutes in which they are immobile. This should give him time to explain the situation, and then flee.

- Both playing as Diana, who I don't believe is male.



If it is the same to you, I don't wish to be among them them without company.

- If it's all the same to you,



I don't know whether to be impressed or terrified, though. The lines of staked Descorians heads was a bit much.

- Descorian heads

- were a bit much.



Shhh. I believe Alpah S'lurix is over there.

- Alpha



They've done that actually. About fifty years ago, they were being pressed hard by the Palidrayan and Maradans. Of course, after their victory, the slaves were 'let go' to make their own way...except that wasn't the case. A field of bodies was found not to long after, the bones picked clean.

- Palidrayans and Maradans.

- not too long after



And its practically a guarantee we would come to blows with the Matrick again after the Descorian war.

- it's practically



I don't know how you can see that with a straight face, Rigel.

- say that



Give your previous actions, don't be surprised if the Matrick still turn on us.

- Given



You didn't taste Shiler's thoughts when the colony's machines revolted. It was sheer terror...never before did one her plans go so badly.

- one of her plans



What!? they're attacking from the opposite side too!

- They're



Good. I hate to say it, but this may be our best shot to taking out the Descorians.

- best shot at



I noticed they weren't with the bases' civilians.

- base's



Unless the beer is starting to affect my memory, but there is someone else who's missing?

- isn't there someone else missing?



By who's command?

- whose



I don't know. Mother...she asked me about what happened here, you know, a personal witness and I told her. She likes to keep things to her chest...

- close to her chest.



I've been jailed here for a day, and considering some of the stories I've heard about your mother, I figure I was going to become an object lesson.

- I figured



However, a good number of people, already distrustful of technology in the first place, would accuse any malfunctioning piece of technology of harboring Descorian code, especially when it resulted into injury or death.

- resulted in



Although, some of her greatest trophies were earned while hunting with Captain Diana Nelson, such as half-mile Boragrub still on display back on Earth.

- such as the half-mile



Mizuki still made sure to find time for her gaming, and even was instrumental in improving many game features such as improving the romance mechanics for centaur-mermaid relations in Age of Arvorn.

- Aravorn.



Captain, is it me, or does the Maradan force seem a bit...light? At least in compared to our previous battles.

- At least when compared to

or -At least compared to



I can speak for myself...unless you decide otherwise, rigel.

- Rigel



Our orders were...amended. However, don't worry, still come from a high source.

- they still come



I won't order you to do betray your conscience, but I'm only asking you to do this because I believe it will save more lives than not. Once the war is over, I swear I'll never ask you to anything like this again.

- to betray

- cosncience, I'm only

- ask you to do anything



Just quiet. I need to concentrate. Even in the best of times, this would be difficult, but the wounded and dying Matrick make it harder.

- Even at the best



Be as it may, but you should reconsider having this...Lucius...here.

- Be that as it

- may, you should



Thanks you for your concern, but I think you will find Lucius is much tougher than he looks.

- Thank you



Then welcome death. While you might accept this fate, what bout your people?

- about



You should stay away from the front-lines more. A Descorian attacked knocked you unconscious.

- the front-lines.

- A Descorian knocked



We're going to have pick some guards, the better to 'protect' Shiler's heir.

- to have to pick



Not that this didn't create other complications since Diana Nelson could only be at one place at a time, and other officers lacked his/her finesse and diplomatic acumen.

- his/her?



Alright, let's get this over with, but at least it is giving my wrist a break.

- over with, at least



Isn't it obvious? The Captain's actions saved all of us from the Descorians. He's earned much honor among the Apex Rahn,

and

Or else you're afraid he might hunt you down otherwise.

- Playing as Diana, probably not a he...



In fact, I would be more worried if she was laying low.

- lying low.



They're not my favorite genre, but their alright. If I wanted to sweat, I'd go to the gym.

- they're alright.



Not really. You've obviously you never seen Apex Rahn spawn.

- obviously never seen



Both sides are guilty of...indiscretions. It will take time overcome this, if they can.

- time to overcome



You have your own qualities I fine attractive such as your bravery, and kindness.

- I find attractive



No, he's quite fine. Every two months, I like to run a series of tests measure how his neural network has adapted to various stimuli.

- tests to measure



It's getting pretty bad when my body is more used to alarm siren than it is to my watch.

- used to the alarm siren



Diana Nelson: Nice job Diana. Next time leave some for me. By the way, what does the damage look like?

- should probably be attributed to Alex.



Just because you can program your brain on the fly, doesn't mean you to should do it to anyone else, Lucius.

- doesn't mean you should



That's probably it. I know she is working on projects outside of my level. It didn't set well with me when I first arrived either.

- sit well



And let me guess, you can't tell me why for this either?

- you can't tell me the reasons why



Next time Lola, maybe you can invite the Palidrayans' over.

- Palidrayans over.



You are words brought up short as see Mira slightly bent over looking into a microscope,

- Your words

- as you see



Heh, nothing like that, dear heart. No, there is no regulation from prohibiting you from seeing your personal doctor.

- no regulation prohibiting you



Why Mr. Nelson, you seem to be experience an unexpected rapid heart-beat.

- be experiencing



And my guidance counselor said I wouldn't amount for much.

- amount to much.



Well, the Apex Rahn pissed of the wrong person.

- pissed off



Mira's hands run along the length of your chest, her fingernails lazily teasing your nipple. She leans forward, and gives it a kiss, then slight bite.

- a slight bite.



Then that would be time for some good old mouth-to-mouth.

- be the time



*laughs* At least I'm not going to have prescribe any...supplements...for you.

- going to have to



I never suspected they a medical table set on vibrate.

- Uhmmm... - I never suspected a medical table could be set to vibrate. (?)



I told you'd find out whether I had another piercing sooner or later.

- told you you'd



You're returned, and in once piece. Good. We tried to raise you, but all we got was static.

- You've returned,



I trust the envoys' needs and safety were attended too during the attack?

- attended to



Alright, you've convinced me. But why haven't brought her into custody?

- why haven't you brought her



Is that where you got the bandage and bruises from? If the Shiler hurt you, she'll...

- If Shiler



Diana advanced in the ranks of the military though it came a little slower than she liked, for with the rise of peace, there we several military cutbacks. However, she was instrumental in creation of small, elite forces

- instrumental in the creation



Mira will get better. You're shared history...well, it's there, but it isn't.

- Your shared



And need I remind if they were in the other position, we might well be the ones on display.

- need I remind you



Please, I picked out special just for you! You'll be so cute!

- I picked it out



Cat ears jut out from the top of your head, while there are only two other pieces of fabric which can be charitably called clothing: a rather tight pair of shorts, and a small furry tail coming from behind it.

- from behind them.



Mizuki giggles slightly, and then you steps into your arms with a flourish.

- then she steps



I have my weaknesses. It's not like I was the only one staring. Your eyes seem glued to my crotch; you and Lola's both.

- seemed glued



Muscle memory. I was so used to do that with a virtual partner, I didn't take into account gravity.

- used to doing that

- didn't take gravity into account.



Well, it is a bit of surprise to have it slip out...

- bit of a surprise



That you did, but High Command had something else in their mind.

- else in mind.



You turn, and see an Orbis come floating down from the sky, and unleashes a beam from its glowing red eye.

- sky, unleashing a beam



Mizuki's fire joins yours as you several hounds emerge from the brush only to meet their ends at your hands.

- as several hounds



The environment bcomes less intricate, but what stands before you are two Mizukis, each armed, and point their gun in your direction.

- pointing



Mizuki starts to sigh and moan as you hold have her thighs at face level,

- you hold her

Franka
That's all I have for now. Still paths I haven't picked and people I haven't team talked... but it's getting to be time for a break from this game.
jack1974
Thanks for the typos. I am waiting to do the next update until I have the deck screen and probably even the video so I can also add the official song, then will be really a matter of a few weeks of final testing :)
Miakoda
Thank you again for everything Franka. Enjoy some time away from the game.



Everything is corrected up to this point.
fabulaparva
Random text-related issues that I ran across. I apologize that I forgot to log down the scene numbers. A few coding problems it seems in these:


http://oi67.tinypic.com/2cpt551.jpg" style="max-width:100%">

http://oi65.tinypic.com/9us17b.jpg" style="max-width:100%">

http://oi63.tinypic.com/t6bl2h.jpg" style="max-width:100%">



Grammar issue in info screen, 1st fight:


http://oi65.tinypic.com/acpsmg.jpg" style="max-width:100%">

suggestion: no problem (in) resisting



Possible typos:


http://oi68.tinypic.com/29lok1w.jpg" style="max-width:100%">

http://oi66.tinypic.com/14ukf8y.jpg" style="max-width:100%">

Lederhosen, I think. Although females would traditionally wear Dirndl dresses for polka, not the silly leatherpants. :)



Not sure about this, but it feels like there's a noun missing between the words foul-smelling and biped.


http://oi66.tinypic.com/x8v2s.jpg" style="max-width:100%">